My school is some crazy public high school who's goal is to send every single kid to college. Which is a really great goal, but it is hell. It's the first day and we come in and sit down and out principle gets onto the announcements and brags about how much scholarship money last year's senior class got, and how well we did on various standardized tests. This is his way of motivating us, and it totally works, but it also has the effect of making my chest feel like a brick. 

    There is gym, which is it's own hell hole with the girls who make me feel weird because I don't shave my legs because shaving legs is for losers who like to be naked and take long showers. Physics gets boring in the first ten minutes on of class on the first day, and people said "gay" in the bad way. 

    I want to drop out and become a poet, but that seems like a really bad idea because it would mean I would have no assured way of supporting myself. Of course, it's not like going to college will assure me a job either. Especially not if I major in something like "creative writing," or "peace and conflict studies." I feel trapped, and I am in all the hardest classes. School is going to take over my life, and not in the good way. 

it is the last friday before i start school; the last friday where i don't care that it's friday.

i have a very small "x" number of hours to read a very large "y" number of pages.

because i was being thrifty the dope was not bought. the "dope" being my calc text book. i am the first person in my family to take calc. i would not be the first person to smoke dope. unless dope was is a code word for "calc text book." i think i would be the first person to smoke a calc text book.